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Who Are James and Myka Stauffer? Inside the YouTubers' Adoption Controversy

2024-12-27 18:33:35 Contact

When you choose to open your life to countless people online, expect a healthy portion of that crowd to let you know when they think you're doing life wrong.

Myka Stauffer and her husband James Stauffer found that out in devastating fashion when they shared in 2020 that their son Huxley was living with "a new forever family," three years after they adopted him from China and featured the emotional journey on their YouTube channel "The Stauffer Life."

The Ohio couple, who also share four biological children, broke the news in a video titled "An Update From Our Family"—an innocuous header that's now the title of a new docuseries revisiting the controversy as an example of the dark side of the family vlogging business.

While their channel has since been deleted, the series incorporates a number of the family's old videos, including footage from January 2017 showing Myka wondering what exactly their son's medical diagnosis would look like after a doctor advised them that he had significant issues. "But if anything," she said in the clip, "my child is not returnable."

E! News reached out to the Stauffers for comment on their story being revisited in the series, which screened June 6 at the Tribeca Film Festival, but has not yet heard back.

A release date for the series has not yet been announced, but this is why the Stauffers made headlines four years ago:

Why did James Stauffer and Myka Stauffer rehome their adopted son Huxley?

"International adoption, sometimes there's unknowns and things that are not transparent on file," James said in the May 26, 2020, video that shocked more than just their 717,000 subscribers in May 2020. "And once Huxley came home there was a lot more special needs that we weren't aware of and that we were not told."

After visiting numerous medical professionals, he explained, doctors ultimately advised that Huxley would benefit from being with a family better equipped to suit his "severe needs."

James said, "We've never wanted to be in this position. And we've been trying to get his needs met and help him out as much as possible...We truly love him."

Added Myka, "There's not an ounce of our body that doesn't love Huxley with all of our being." 

With the help of an adoption agency, she said, Huxley had been placed with a new family that could give him the level of care he required.

"Do I feel like a failure as a mom? Like, 500 per cent," Myka continued, noting the agency "found somebody that they felt would be ultimately the best fit and he is thriving, he is very happy, he is doing very well and his new mommy has medical professional training and it is a very good fit."

And they were sharing this news publicly, she noted, because "you guys have been there for us for so much and I want to fill you in on what's going on."

How did Maya Stauffer and James Stauffer rehome their adopted son?

The Stauffers were not met with an overwhelmingly warm, sympathetic response from nonjudgmental strangers on the Internet.

Not that some productive conversation didn't take place, the Stauffers not alone when it came to having an adopted child re-adopted by another family, a process known as "rehoming." In 2018, according to The Atlantic, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services estimated that of the roughly 135,000 adoptions finalized every year in the U.S., between 1 and 5 percent ended up legally dissolved.

But a lot of online critics accused them of "returning" their child and otherwise not being very good people.

Myka had previously shared in an essay for The Bump that, when they brought then-2-year-old Huxley back to the U.S., he was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder level 3. She described him as "profoundly developmentally delayed."

In a September 2019 video, she said that Huxley had been in applied behavior analysis therapy and was "doing so well," but there were subsequent social media updates that indicated Myka was struggling.

"The last couple days have been hard," she wrote in a February 2020 Instagram post. "I don't want to sugar coat anything...I wish autism and adoption trauma had a manual to direct you through it all."

Her last post featuring Huxley was from March 28, 2020. "Last month was the hardest month I have ever had as a mama. And I'm still working through all of it," Myka wrote. "But instead of leading with my heart, I'm following yours."

On May 10, she posted that it had been the "hardest Mother's Day I have ever had." Two weeks later, Myka and James shared that Huxley was no longer living with them.

Lawyers for the couple said in the wake of their viral announcement that the pair had made "the best decision" for Huxley.

"In coming to know our clients, we know they are a loving family and are very caring parents that would do anything for their children," the attorneys said in a May 27, 2020, statement to BuzzFeed News. "Since his adoption, they consulted with multiple professionals in the healthcare and educational arenas in order to provide Huxley with the best possible treatment and care."

"Over time," the statement continued, "the team of medical professionals advised our clients it might be best for Huxley to be placed with another family. This is devastating news for any parent."

How did Myka Stauffer respond to the adoption rehoming backlash?

Days later, Myka waded into the comments section under their initial video to further explain how Huxley's second adoption unfolded.

"We would never just give up a child with special needs, this is a personal matter to Hux," she replied to her critics. "It had nothing to do with he just had Autism. Multiple scary things happened inside the home towards our other children, and if these events happened with one of my biological kids, after all the help and after the behaviors we witnessed sadly we would have no other choice then to seek help and get their needs met."

She added that Huxley, in spending time with the other family, "constantly chose" them. He "showed tons of emotion to show us and let us know he wanted this," Myka wrote. "Huxley never had a say in his adoption, and he needed more help and also wanted this and we know that 100%."

But it wasn't long before Myka was stepping away from the public eye.

Her last Instagram post is a lengthy statement from June 24, 2020, apologizing for the "uproar" and taking responsibility for the hurt she had caused.

"This decision has caused so many people heart break and I'm sorry for letting down so many women that looked up to me as a mother," she wrote. She was also sorry "for not being able to tell more of my story from the beginning."

Myka further apologized for "being so naive" when they started the adoption process, admitting that she wasn't properly equipped to manage Huxley's needs. She didn't regret bringing him to the states, where he was getting the help he needed, Myka continued, but she acknowledged that, though he was "happier in his new home and doing better," he had experienced trauma.

"I wanted to help so bad I was willing to bring home any child that needed me," she wrote. "For this I was naïve, foolish, and arrogant. I wish so bad I would have been more prepared and done more. I wish the decision to disrupt never had to be made."

Myka also pushed back against some of the unkindest assessments of her and James, including that they'd basically adopted Huxley for the clicks.

"We did not adopt a child to gain wealth," she wrote. Some of their posts made money, but "every penny and much more went back into his care."

"And lastly I'm so sorry for letting you down," Myka added. "I also want to mention that moms need a safe place to ask for help when they are struggling. No questions asked. We love Huxley and know that this was the right decision for him and his future."

Were Myka Stauffer and James Stauffer ever under investigation for rehoming their adopted son?

A Delaware County Sheriff's Office spokeswoman told E! News in early June 2020 that the department had received "several inquiries regarding the welfare" of a local child who'd been put up for adoption and their investigation was "ongoing" to ensure the child's safety.

At the same time, the spokeswoman added, authorities were "confident that the appropriate process" was occurring as far as all parties were following adoption protocols, and that both parties were represented by lawyers "to ensure full compliance with the court process."

The investigation was closed by the end of the month, authorities concluding in a report obtained by BuzzFeed that Huxley was "safe with a new family."

Where are Myka Stauffer and James Stauffer now?

While the Stauffers have kept a much lower profile in recent years as far as their family is concerned, James' "Stauffer Garage" YouTube channel dedicated to cars is up and running with 1.3 million followers.

Keep reading to see more online influencers who ran into controversy:

Her YouTube alter ego may sing, but it's Colleen Ballinger who faced the music in 2023. The Internet star known for her intentionally awkward Miranda Sings persona found herself facing allegations of grooming and forming inappropriate relationships with underage fans.

In a since-deleted June video titled "why I left the colleen ballinger fandom…", YouTuber KodeeRants shared screenshots of an alleged text exchange between Colleen and her followers, accusing the comedian of forming exploitative relationships with underage fans.

Per NBC News, the unverified group text was named "Colleeny's Weenies," with the performer allegedly asking her fans their "favorite position" during one conversation. NBC News was unable to verify the screenshots. 

Days later, content creator Adam McIntyre—who first began running a fan account for Miranda Sings when he was 10—responded with videos on his own YouTube claiming Ballinger grooms her fans emotionally.

Ballinger has yet to directly respond to his claims, nor did she respond to E! News' request for comment. But on June 28, the mother of three addressed the accusations in a 10-minute ukulele song posted to her personal YouTube account. In the video, Ballinger likened the accusations to a "toxic gossip train" headed for "manipulation station" as the rest of the internet "tie me to the tracks and harass me for my past."

In July, the remaining dates of her Miranda Sings tour were canceled. She hasn't posted to social media since.

Girl, watch your mouth. It all started when the Girl, Wash Your Face author posted about her house cleaner and it got increasingly dirty. 

In a clip of the since-deleted post resurfaced by Angie Treasure, Hollis referenced an April 2021 livestream where she spoke about a woman who "cleans the toilets," noting that "someone commented and said, 'You're privileged AF' and I was like, 'You're right. I'm super freaking privileged, but also I worked my ass off to have the money to have someone come twice a week and clean my toilets' and I told her that. And then she said, 'Well, you're unrelatable.'"

Hollis' response was to explain she had no interest in being relatable pointing out that icons and historical figures like Harriet TubmanRuth Bader GinsburgMarie Curie and Oprah Winfrey were "all unrelatable AF." 

Exceptwhile selling millions of copies of her books is great, a revered abolitionist she is not. 

Days later, Hollis issued an Instagram apology, explaining, "I know I've caused tremendous pain in mentioning prominent women—including several women of color—whose struggles and achievements I can't possibly understand." Moreover, she continued, "I disregarded the people whose hard work doesn't afford them financial security, often due to inherently racist and biased systems."

Added the Girl, Stop Apologizing author, "The important thing for me to do now, something I should have already done, is honestly, be quiet and listen."

In March 2020, the founder of the Something Navy clothing line and the OG blog told her Instagram followers she had tested positive for COVID-19, vowing to quarantine in her Manhattan apartment with husband Brandon Charnas and their daughters Ruby and Esme. But eight days later, her whole crew—including her nanny—decamped to the Hamptons. 

Let's just say, it wasn't her best look. The comments on her Instagram page grew increasingly heated as she boasted about taking walks outdoors for "fresh air"rather than maintain social distance. 

When her husband cracked that only "hot" people were getting the virus, emotions boiled over.  

She later posted a lengthy apology addressing many concerns—their nanny was with them because she, too, had contracted the virus; they had doormen clear out the lobby of their building before departing, hadn't stopped for gas and had groceries delivered; her Hamptons pad was on a relatively isolated street—but the damage lingered. 

Nordstrom, who had been carrying Charnas' line, announced they wouldn't renew the contract that had expired in 2019. In response, Charnas, who welcomed third daughter Navy in 2021, pivoted to a direct-to-consumer relaunch, explaining, "I wanted more control," and is now back to posting about her favorite Shopbop picks and collabs with A Pea in the Pod.

Her valuable takeaway, she shared on The Glossy Podcast, "People wanted me to be more sensitive about what was going on in the world, and I should have been."

In 2020 fashion influencer Emily Gellis Lande dished out a healthy serving of criticism to registered dietitian Zuckerbrot. In a series of posts, Gellis Lande shared anonymous tales from dieters, not verified by E! News, at least one of which who said she had paid upwards of $20,000 to follow the New Yorker's high-fiber F-Factor Diet only to experience rashes, intense cramps, indications of metal poisoning and—in the most extreme allegation—a miscarriage. Gellis Lande's crusade caught the attention of The New York Times which published a piece detailing the saga. 

Having hired lawyer Lanny Davis, once White House special council to former president Bill Clinton, Zuckerbrot denied the claims and the suggestion that her plan led to disordered eating, telling the paper that across upwards of 176,000 purchases of her snack bars and powders she had received just 50 health complaints. She later released a Certificate of Analysis to dispute concerns the products contained heavy metals and went on Today to further defend her program.

As for Gellis Lande, Zuckerbrot is hardly impressed. "I believe in her mind she thinks she's helping people and that the lifestyle I lead is poisoning everyone and giving them anorexia," Zuckerbrot, who's worked with Megyn Kelly, sniped to the Times. "But she's a fashion blogger."

Zuckerbrot filed two lawsuits against Gellis Lande, claiming she "began a smear campaign to destroy" her brand. Both suits are pending. Gellis Lande has denied the claims.

Much of the world underwent a long overdue racial awakening in 2020. But it was stylist—and Meghan Markle friend—Jessica Mulroney who got a wake-up call. In a nearly 12-minute Instagram video, lifestyle blogger Sasha Exeter explained her issues with her acquaintance began when Mulroney "took offense" to Exeter's plea that her followers "use their voice for good and help combat the race war and what's happening to the Black community." 

Believing the message target her, Exeter continued, Mulroney engaged in "very problematic" behavior, allegedly speaking poorly about Exeter to other brands and "sending me a threat in writing." Though Mulroney commented on Exeter's video with an apology, she later sent a DM that Exeter shared, Mulroney writing, "Liable [sic] suit. Good luck."

Though Mulroney posted a mea culpa to her own followers, announcing her intentions to promote "Black voices by having them take over my account and share their experience," CTV announced they were dropping her reality show I Do, Redo.

Speaking "about the situation surrounding my wife, Jessica," her husband Ben Mulroney stepped down from his role as co-host of CTV's eTalk, stating, "It is my hope that the new anchor is Black, Indigenous, or a person of color who can use this important platform to inspire, lead, and make change." But the mom of three did get to keep her high-profile friendship, writing in a since-deleted post, "Meghan and I are family. She is the kindest friend."

Known for such cinematic greatness as "I DUCT TAPED My Brothers $400,000 Dollar TRUCK!" and getting fired from Disney Channel's Bizaardvark, the Vine star turned YouTube personality graduated to the big leagues in 2020.

On the morning of Aug. 5, FBI authorities executed a federal search warrant at Paul's Calabasas, Calif., home, the bureau confirming it was in connection to a May 30 incident at a Scottsdale, Ariz., mall. Broadcasting live from a Black Lives Matter protest that ended at the city's Fashion Square Mall, Paul unlawfully entered and remained inside the shopping center after cops ordered everyone to leave, police insisted in a statement. (Paul responded on Twitter that while he was documenting the protest, "neither I nor anyone in our group was engaged in any looting or vandalism.") 

Conversation about the reason for the FBI raid grew as outsized as his YouTube following, as video from a local ABC station showed multiple firearms being carried into a police vehicle, Paul insisted in a since-deleted Aug. 12 video that the search was "entirely related to the Arizona looting situation that happened. It's an investigation. There are rumors about it having to do with so many other things that have nothing to do with me or my character and the s--t that people are making up is absolutely absurd."

While no charges were filed, Paul's attorney told E! News in a statement that they intended to "cooperate with the investigation."

More than a year after making up with fellow beauty vlogger Tati Westbrook, the YouTube sensation started falling into some new feuds. First, in an August 2020 subtweet "about how I thought some celebrities shouldn't launch makeup lines," he insinuated that perpetually bare-faced Alicia Keys had no business having a skincare collection, later apologizing because he's "not the gatekeeper of makeup." 

But not two weeks later the Instant Influencer host was forced to cover up another mistake when he came for Lauren Conrad's new beauty line. Slamming The Hills alum in a series of Instagram Stories, he showed his 22 million followers the empty packaging he'd received "from a new makeup brand from somebody who has no business having a makeup brand."

Fortunately the LC Lauren Conrad fashion designer didn't shed a single mascara tear, hilariously copping to her misstep on Instagram by blaming the "woman who put together the gifts" (read: the winged eyeliner expert herself). Having put empty samples into a bag to test if they would fit, "When beauty products arrived and it was time to fill all the makeup bags she (again, me) accidentally included the bag full of empties with the others and it was sent out," Conrad shared. "She will be let go immediately."

Charles later apologized, saying the videos were meant to be funny and sharing that "Lauren and I spoke privately about the misunderstanding & are both good." Still, it's pretty clear he knows what he did. 

When The Stauffer Life vlogger and YouTuber kicked off a May 2020 video by saying, "This is by far the hardest video James and I have ever publicly had to make," it was evident she wouldn't be sharing her newborn nighttime routine or her daily diet. Instead, she and her husband revealed they had placed their then-4-year-old son Huxley, adopted from China in 2017, with "his now new forever family" after struggling to manage his autism. 

The reaction from their nearly 1 million subscribers could best be categorized as outraged, fans debating whether the couple—parents to four other children—were simply naive or had exploited Huxley for clicks and donations only to discard him when his care became too challenging. The two lost followers and brand collaborators, the likes of Fabletics, Suave and Danimals announcing that they were severing ties and Ohio's Delaware County Sheriff's Office even confirmed to E! News that they were investigating the well-being of Huxley. 

Authorities announced in late June that they had closed their case "without any charges," but Myka's brand remains shut down as well. A once constant Internet presence, she hasn't posted to YouTube or Instagram since she issued a lengthy statement, apologizing for "being so naive when I started the adoption process," and noting that they were "not under any type of investigation."

Quite the ride. When Hall announced in May 2020 that he and his fellow TikTok star "might do a whole road trip all the way across country in the next few days..." they received more than just the sightseeing recommendations they were after. Hall's Twitter followers were already less than thrilled that the two were flouting stay at home recommendations to take a trip, causing the Gen Z idol to shoot back, "most states lifted quarantine, the boys are driving across country staying out of contact from everyone... it's not that deep."

But they dug an even deeper hole when they passed through Lee County, Tex. five days later, the sheriff's office confirming that Hall was arrested and charged with possession of marijuana and Hossler arrested and charged with possession of controlled substances. (They both posted bail the next day. E! News reached out to both reps for comment at the time. Hall's rep declined to comment; Hossler's didn't respond.) 

In a June essay, Hall told People he'd "started on the path" toward getting sober: "While I've messed up in the past, I'm learning and growing... and I will make you proud. I promise."

Some pranks are cute. Say, George Clooney and Brad Pitt covering Julia Roberts' dressing room door in shaving cream. This is not that. In October 2019, the YouTube personalities, known as the Stokes Twins clad themselves in black and, pretending as if they'd just robbed a bank, called an Uber to serve as a getaway while a camera rolled. Definitely not in on the joke, the Uber driver refused to peel away and a bystandercalled the cops. 

"Irvine police arrived and ordered the Uber driver out at gunpoint," the Orange County District Attorney's Office later shared in a press release. The driver was released once authorities determined he was not involved, the release continued, and "police issued a warning to the Stokes brothers about the dangers of their conduct."

Four hours later the twins allegedly recreated the routine on the University of California, Irvine campus, resulting in their arrest. Facing up to four years in prison if convicted on false imprisonment and swatting charges, they received the ire of Orange County D.A. Todd Spitzer, who said in a statement, "These are crimes that could have resulted in someone getting seriously injured or even killed."

In a 2020 news release, their lawyer said, "We can say without hesitation that our clients are in fact not guilty of any crimes." Still, they pled guilty to lesser charges of misdemeanor false imprisonment and reporting false emergencies, receiving 160 hours of community service and one year of probation. 

Crowned the "King of YouTube" for his lengthy videos that earned him some 34 million followers, Dawson saw his reign end in June 2020 after he posted a since-deleted explosive tweet about why he was leaving the online beauty community. "They are all attention seeking, game playing, egocentric, narcissistic, vengeful, two-faced, ticking time bombs ready to explode. And I'm OVER it," he griped, calling out James Charles in particular as "a young, egocentric, power-hungry guru who needed to be served a slice of humble pie in the size of the f--king Empire State Building."

His followers were not impressed, noting that those that live in glass glam rooms shouldn't throw stones. And within days Dawson had posted a 20-minute video titled "Taking Accountability" in which he apologized for his own bad behavior, noting "I have done a lot of things in my past that I hate," including using blackface, making racist remarks and jokes about pedophilia and posting a video that sexualized a then-11-year-old Willow Smith

"This video is coming from a place of just wanting to own up to my s--t, wanting to own up to everything I've done on the internet that has hurt people, that has added to the problem, that has not been handled well," he said. "I should have been punished for things." Which he was, YouTube suspending his ability to monetize his three accounts. 

He returned to creating content in 2021, saying, "I'm so grateful that I got cancelled, because it really changed my life."

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