32 things we learned in NFL Week 16: Christmas gifts arrive early – for some teams

The 32 things we learned from Week 16 of the 2023 NFL season:

1. Merry Christmas, Motown. Sunday, the Detroit Lions won the NFC North for the first time since it came into existence in 2002 while earning their first division crown since 1993 – back when the Leos played in the old NFC Central.

2. QB Jared Goff, who's postseason-bound for the first time since he arrived in Detroit in the 2021 offseason, had a Drew Lock moment after the momentous win – his voice cracking with emotion when discussing the Lions' achievement with NFL Network's Tom Pelissero. Good for Goff, effectively cast off by the Los Angeles Rams nearly three years ago, and especially his tenured teammates who suffered through so many lean years in Honolulu Blue.

3. As new Kings in the North, the Lions will soon be hosting their first playoff game at Ford Field, whose only other postseason utility came when the Seattle Seahawks and Pittsburgh Steelers met in Super Bowl 40 nearly 18 years ago.

4. Only the Cleveland Browns have gone longer without a division crown, their drought extending back to 1989 ... yes, when they were members of the AFC Central.

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5. Yet hope persists for the Brownies, winners of three in a row after Sunday's 36-22 drubbing of the Houston Texans. Cleveland is still in the mix for the AFC North title and would get some needed help if the Baltimore Ravens lose to the San Francisco 49ers on Monday night.

6. That aside, win next week and the Browns will sew up just their third postseason berth since rejoining the league as an expansion team in 1999.

7. That 1999 expansion season aside, Cleveland's NFL history does go back more than seven decades. Yet WR Amari Cooper etched his name into franchise lore Sunday, racking up a team-record 265 receiving yards (while scoring twice among his 11 catches).

7a. Cooper joined Hall of Famer Terrell Owens as the only players in NFL history to have 200-yard receiving games with three different teams. Cooper had one with the Oakland Raiders, who drafted him in 2015, and two others with the Dallas Cowboys.

8. Want more good news from the Great Lakes region? We got you. The Buffalo Bills weren't playing on the banks of Lake Erie on Saturday night, but they did persevere for a 24-22 defeat of the Los Angeles Chargers just a stone's throw from the Pacific Ocean.

8a. Winners of three in a row and four of five, Buffalo will be a playoff team with two more wins ... and might even win a fourth straight AFC East title but will need the Miami Dolphins to lose next week to Baltimore.

9. And up on the shores of Lake Michigan, the Chicago Bears have won three of four after knocking off their former Windy City cotenants, the Arizona Cardinals. Pretty good day for the Bears, too, considering the Panthers also lost, increasing the odds Chicago winds up with the No. 1 pick Carolina will have to give them due to this year's pre-draft trade.

10. If you're the Lions or eventual NFC East champion, whether that be Dallas or the Philadelphia Eagles, you better be on the screws during the wild-card round, at least based on the way things are shaping up. The Rams and Seahawks can't do better than being wild-card entries ... but would you want to see either one of them in your building?

11. Detroit may be facing the prospect of hosting the Seahawks, a team that's shredded the Lions defense in recent years, or the Rams ... and all the hullabaloo that would come with QB Matthew Stafford's return to Ford Field.

12. Good team win for the Dolphins on Sunday, the AFC East leaders collecting their first triumph against a winning team by scratching out a victory over the Cowboys. Win out, and the Fins will be the AFC's No. 1 seed.

12a. Bad team loss for Dallas, which surrendered first place in the NFC East to the Eagles while greatly increasing the odds they won't play in the comforts of AT&T Stadium, where they've won 15 in a row, during the playoffs.

13. And tough day in South Florida for anyone harboring MVP aspirations, Miami QB Tua Tagovailoa and WR Tyreek Hill and Dallas QB Dak Prescott doing little to distinguish themselves in a muddled group.

13a. After sitting out Week 15 with a bum ankle, Hill returned to gain 99 yards on nine receptions. But he'll need 359 yards over the final two games to hit his 2,000-yard goal.

14. Steelers QB3 Mason Rudolph became the 58th different passer to start league-wide this season and availed himself well in his first start in two years, passing for 290 yards and two scores in a 34-11 defeat of the Cincinnati Bengals that kept playoff hopes alive in the Steel City.

15. Doesn't hurt when Steelers WR George Pickens is actively engaged and averages nearly 50 yards a catch on his four receptions − including two long strikes (86 and 66 yards) from Rudolph.

16. New York Jets QB3 Trevor Siemian became the 59th different passer to start league-wide this season and availed himself, uh, decently in his first start in more than a year, passing for 217 yards, one TD and one INT in a 30-28 defeat of the Washington Commanders ... which stoked NYJ pride after the team nearly lost after surrendering a 20-point lead but was bailed out by a 54-yard Greg Zuerlein field goal in the final seconds?

17. Commanders QB2 Jacoby Brissett hasn't started this season but probably should have. For the second week in a row, he thoroughly outplayed starter Sam Howell (6-for-22, 56 yards, 2 INTs on Sunday) after relieving him, leading Washington on three consecutive TD drives in its failed comeback bid.

18. Still, the Commanders were so bad, they couldn't overcome a Jets squad that committed 14 penalties for 150 yards. Fourteen penalties!

18a. In a matchup of a moveable object (Washington's last-ranked defense) and a resistible force (the Jets' last-ranked offense), advantage force – largely courtesy of Jets RB Breece Hall's big day (2 TDs, 191 yards from scrimmage).

19. If you were among those snickering at NFL Network's advance billing of Sunday night's game between the New England Patriots and Denver Broncos as a "Holiday Classic," ... welp, chalk one up for the marketing department.

19a. And if you're a Pats fan? Seem like Bill Belichick might be scorching the earth on his way out?

20. Anybody want to win the AFC South? All four of the division's teams lost Sunday, the Jacksonville Jaguars, Houston Texans and Indianapolis Colts still knotted with 8-7 records. The Jags' 4-1 division record leaves them in the best position ... so to speak on a day they lost 30-12 and salty QB Trevor Lawrence was dreadful again before getting pulled in the second half with a shoulder injury.

21. Tampa Bay Buccaneers WR Mike Evans snared two more TDs in Sunday's win over Jacksonville, the first-place Bucs' fourth in a row. Evans now has 13 scoring receptions this season – his fifth with at least a dozen. Only four other players have managed this feat – Marvin Harrison, Randy Moss, Owens and Jerry Rice – and they're all in the Hall of Fame.

22. The Bills' Josh Allen is a historically good multi-talented quarterback. Saturday, he became the first player in league history with four consecutive seasons producing at least 40 total touchdowns – whether passing or rushing.

23. Allen's 51 career rushing TDs trail only Cam Newton (75) among quarterbacks.

24. Allen also extended his own record, set last week, with his 11th game with at least one passing and rushing touchdown in the same season.

25. Browns DE Myles Garrett has gone sack-less in five consecutive games. Weird.

26. Minnesota Vikings QB2 Nick Mullens has been picked off six times over the past two weeks. Woof.

27. Thoughts on NBC's Saturday double coverage:

27a. If 26-year-old Noah Eagle wasn't the son of esteemed play-by-play man Ian Eagle, would he be getting the opportunity to call the Bengals-Steelers game? I don't know. Is Noah Eagle exceptionally good on the call, particularly at his age? Most definitely.

27b. The cord lovers may hate it, but how was the viewing experience for Saturday night's Bills-Chargers game streamed on NBC's Peacock service? Aside from timing out abruptly during Mike Tirico's postgame comments, perfectly fine. And, for what it's worth, the fast-forward and rewind functionality is eminently superior to Prime Video's.

28. Monday's Christmas action will commence at 1 p.m. ET at Arrowhead Stadium, when the Kansas City Chiefs will attempt to defeat the Las Vegas Raiders and thereby win their eighth consecutive AFC West crown.

29. By beating the New York Giants on Christmas afternoon, the Eagles will solidify their hold on the NFC East, which they already controlled – in terms of their playoff path – prior to the Cowboys' loss Sunday.

29a. And hopefully fans at the Linc will take it easy on Santa ... if he shows up.

30. Monday night's Ravens-49ers game pits two teams currently seeded atop their respective conferences but with work to do before either is able to lock up home-field advantage and the first-round playoff bye that comes with it. This matchup marks the third since the 1970 AFL-NFL merger when the teams atop each conference will meet in December or later.

31. This is only the second time since the merger that the teams with the league's top two records meet in Week 16 or later.

32. Happy holidays, y'all. May the football be the least enjoyable component of your week.

Follow USA TODAY Sports' Nate Davis on X, formerly Twitter @ByNateDavis.